For the most part, I like to think that I'm a pretty easy-going kinda gal. I'm relatively easy to please and get along with most everyone that I meet, so long as they have at least some semblance of a sense of humor. But every now and then, I start to realize that I have a relatively long list of things that really get under my skin - things that make me wish it were legal to slap the stupid out of people when necessary. I can't say that it's just an intolerance for ignorance - it goes beyond that. I think it's more of an intolerance for the fake, unnecessary, and inconsiderate...and impatience definitely fuels a lot of the peeves on my list.
Realizing that this runs the risk of being the longest post in blog history, I'm only going to stick to the top 5 things that make me realize that I should really thank God that spontaneous combustion due to irritation overload is not really possible.
5. Personalized license plates. Wow. You really spent precious brain cells coming up with the plate that reads "VETYNICE" for your corvette. As if you didn't already look like a loser driving your yellow convertible advertisement for your midlife crisis. Oh, and "SPOILD1," good luck getting out of a traffic ticket given the fact that you're making it known that you're in desperate need of a reality check.
4. Wearing entirely inappropriate attire Ladies:just because it zips, doesn't mean it fits. If your end result resembles an overly stuffed sausage, go up a size. And I should never, ever have to fear getting a sneak peak of your unmentionables. If it's that short, or low cut, you shouldn't leave home in it. Finally, if the heels are so high that you can't walk without assistance, don't wear them. If you forego this advice, you deserve the butt busting fall that's sure to come. And for you guys out there, pull up your damn pants! It is not, I repeat, NOT sexy to see your underwear hanging out of your pants. Isn't it counterproductive to have to hold up your pants the whole time you're trying to walk?
3. Driving under the speed limit in the passing lane. Need I say more? Vehicles should come equipped with mini front-loading missle launchers for situations such as this.
2. Blowing your nose at the dinner table. Because nothing makes my meal more enjoyable than hearing someone expelling snot from their nose.
1. Skipping hand washing after using the bathroom. This peeve has to be universal, right? I've seen it way too often. How disgusting are you that you don't wash your hands after using the potty? I don't care how many woven layers your TP has, you're not going to convince me that your hands are completely clean after you wipe! Perhaps you missed the lessons in hygiene that the rest of the population manage to pay attention to. But I swear, next time I catch one of you filthy germ-carrying pests, I will follow you out of the bathroom and announce your faux pas loudly to everyone in earshot. Because humiliation is definitely the best way to permanently ingrain something into someone's conscious.
Those being put out there, I have to give brief mention to the runner-ups for my list of most annoying pet peeves, which include smoking immediately outside the doors of a non-smoking establishment, wearing so much cologne that my nasal membranes go into attack mode before I even spot you, fake tanning until you're orange (because skin cancer is so sexy,) parking in handicapped spots when you're clearly not handicapped, and using foul language loudly in public (because you're classy like that.)
I could go on and on, but those are the peeves that top my list. I would like to think that they are completely reasonable. What are your top five?
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